An Important Lesson

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Some years ago, I was riding around my neighborhood with my brother Michael. In the past we used to discuss a lot of things together. And sometimes I would seesaw back and forward talking about one particular subject before moving onto the next one. But I admit, sometimes I get carried away with one subject, and I tend to go on and on about it. And I won't deny that there are somethings I'm obsessed with. But over the years, I noticed a pattern in my brother's behavior. When something catches his interest, he enjoys it for a while. But then after a certain length of time has elapsed, he grows bored of it, and he forgets all about it. Now, people have their own different ways of moving on. In the case of my brother, he tends to forget about certain things, and he only retains certain subjects in memory. But in my case, I don't just forget about the things I experience. I remember for years and years. But some memories get buried deep inside my head until something triggers them. But nevertheless I tend to return to certain subjects out of nostalgia or when there's nothing new that sparks my interest. After all, its hard to find good entertainment nowadays. But more often than not, my brother accuses me of being too "old-school" even though I have opened up to some of the newer stuff of today and more recent years. And he always tells me to get into something new. But then again, my brother has a knack for getting on my case about everything no matter how big or small it is. But there was this one time when I was talking about a particular subject, and he just snapped out of nowhere.

As we were in the car, I chuckled about something. He asked me what it was. I told him what was on my mind, saying that I remembered what he said about certain anime characters always being mad. Now, this is in direct relation to how my brother treats me because he accuses me of always being mad (though he accuses me for everything and once even insulted me about it saying that "I like being mad" when that is not true at all). But the thing is I was only discussing something so small and minor in our conversation about certain anime characters being mad all the time. And I didn't even go too much in depth with it. And for no reason at all, he snapped at me, saying "Forget about that stuff, man!" And before I could say anything in my defense, my brother acts on his arrogance and his God-complex, refusing to hear me out, and forcing me to listen to him like his authority is absolute. He gives me a long, tedious, and unnecessary lecture, saying that I should forget about the old stuff and look for new things to get into, ending it with saying "You understand, bro? Nothing old, but something new." And he didn't even give me a chance to say anything. Like I said before, my brother was always a stubborn and egotistical bastard. Because he doesn't respect anybody's opinions, he doesn't care what anybody else thinks, and he just doesn't know when to call it a quits. Anybody who disagrees with him suffers his wrath. Everything has to be his way or the highway. Now, let me just get a few things out of the way first. I do see his point. I understand he was bored of what I was talking about. Because again, I tend to gush over childhood memories, and I tend to talk about certain subjects at great length. I won't deny that I do have my fixations and obsessions. But hey, we ALL have our obsessions. And there's nothing wrong with that as long as you have your obsessions under control, and as long as they don't dominate 100% of your everyday life. Take it from me, while I do indeed have my obsessions, I have managed to open up to some of the newer things of today, and I have managed to adapt to changing times. Today as an adult, I have accepted the fact that things do in fact change as the years go by and as new generations are born. But I find my brother's narc-speech for a lack of a better term to be not only pointless, but also redundant as hell. Because the thing is he has obsessions of his own. Michael has VERY SPECIFIC tastes in music, and he has his favorite bands. But never in the history of EVER, did I once tell him "Dude, you listen to this all the time! Listen to something else!" And nor did I ever shout in his face saying "Forget about that shit, man!" You know why? Because I don't like to boss people around. I don't give orders and force people to satisfy my petty preferences. I let people make their own decisions. However, when given the chance to, I like to make suggestions to some people about what they can check out and get into. But I always do this in a polite and respectful manner. And looking back at my records today, I think I've come a long way. I mean heck, look at how many subjects I've reviewed thus far. Granted, while I do tend to revisit certain subjects, I have shown that I'm quite versatile and adaptable, and I have gained my knowledge through many of my past experiences and many different sources. In some ways, history can shape the future.

I remember back in 2005 when I was under-educated about online shopping, I found something that I wanted. But I didn't know how to order stuff online. So I made the mistake of asking my arrogant brother for help. And this of course had predictable consequences. I told him that I wanted to order the "Transformers: The Movie" soundtrack album. But Michael, being the complete jackass he is, boldly questions why I wanted this item, and he argues with me about it, saying its just for little kids, that its too old, and I should just let it go and move on. I rebuked his reasons, saying that its part of my childhood and my history, and every piece of nostalgia is worth collecting. But the stubborn bastard goes on and on, lecturing me and doing whatever he could to hinder me from buying the item that I wanted. He even goes as far to accuse me saying that I'm obsessed with Transformers, that its all I ever think about, and that its not for people my age. Truth be told, a lot of people my age, younger, or older, are into things that are not of their age group. But just because something is for kids doesn't mean you can't enjoy it. And just because something is old doesn't mean you can't enjoy it as long as it still has artistic and nostalgic value. Again, my brother listens to a lot of old bands, but I respect the things he's into. But Michael doesn't respect my opinions or my likes and dislikes at all. In his mind, he has to make my decisions for me and play God with my life. But even when I stated my reasons for wanting the item, he boasts "But its old!" to which I answered "That's all you know what to say about it!" Because let me tell you something. Back in the 80s, my brother used to be a big Transformers fan like me. But today, he doesn't give a shit about Transformers at all. He has made that quite clear. Yet he would never admit it even in a million years. But seriously, was it really necessary for him to make things difficult for me just because I wanted to buy something from my childhood? I mean all I wanted was some freaking music for crying out loud, and he made such a big deal out of such a tiny little thing. And not only that, but as usual, my mother proved herself to be unreliable when she boldly took sides with Michael against me, telling me to just agree with him and don't argue with him. For these reasons, I learned to do my own online shopping, so that I don't have to ask for anybody's help or permission. Because seriously, if people are just going to give you trouble rather than agreeing to your wishes, then what's the point of asking for help at all? And I remember when my brother finally gave in and decided to stop arguing with me, he acted childish, and said "Okay, fine! But don't let everything you buy just be Transformers! Transformers! Transformers! Transformers" all while repeatedly slamming his hand against the table. I was like "Seriously, Michael, don't be childish". I mean he accuses me of being immature. But Michael is pretty immature himself. Which is why most of the times I just try to avoid him as much as possible. Because like I said before, the relation between me and him is a VERY dysfunctional relation. And sadly, Michael hasn't changed at all over time. He's always going to be Mr. Bossy. And he's always going to cling to his God complex like he's an all powerful and all knowing God. His ego knows no bounds, which is why I lost half my respect for him long ago.

But as I digress, I want to make something clear here. Everything gets old through the passage of time. Yes, everything. Humanity is always making new things. But they slowly deteriorate over time. For example, the Dracula novel by Bram Stoker was brand new when it was first published in 1897. But as of today, the novel is 120 years old. And everything that is new today will become old in the next decade. Life is basically an ongoing cycle of old things being forgotten, and new things popping up. And as time passes, the new things become old things, and on and on it goes. That's just the way life is, people. And I know this for a fact. But I don't let the passage of time worry me too much when I know I can still enjoy my life in anyway shape or form. And sometimes nostalgia can be a good thing to hold onto so as long as you balance it with some of the newer things out there. Granted, its not easy finding new entertainment that's actually good. But its always important to keep track of dates and what year it is. Because the world is always changing. People are always coming up with new ideas, inventing new medicines, building new vehicles and coming up with newer and better technologies. And there's always something new playing in the theaters. Like I said before in my review of "White Fang", sometimes when you go looking for something new to get into you find a diamond in a rough. Other times you find a turd covered in toxic waste. But if you look hard enough (which admittedly I have trouble doing sometimes), you can come across some exceptionally and breath-taking things. Like "Toy Story 3", "Zootopia", the live action "Ghost in the Shell", or any of the Marvel Cinematic Universe films just to name a few. Believe me, I have been keeping track of time. My mind isn't always in the past. And contrary to what my brother would say about me that I have nothing on my mind, I have a lot of things going on in my mind. But sometimes I have trouble getting my thoughts organized. The lesson I'm trying to convey here is that everybody has their likes and dislikes, and everybody has different tastes. And everything gets old. But the thing is we're supposed to be grateful for what we have. And I cherish what I have. Some people hold onto their childhood memories (some more obsessively than others do), and some people grow out of certain franchises and move onto something different. In my case however, I value my nostalgia. But when something grows stale, I tend to put it aside for the time being until I'm ready to return to it again. But in the meantime, I'm constantly searching for newer things. If I come across something I like, it becomes part of my history. And if I come across something that's familiar, I embrace it because its part of my history. Like my therapist once told me, "We don't have to forget about what impacted us in our childhood. Its our history. We don't have to brainwash ourselves. But the world is always changing. So you must always keep a look out for newer things." And that's the thing. And also, when a certain subject grows old or becomes boring, you can always put that aside and focus on something different. And when someone tends to go on and on about a particular subject, there are better and more polite ways to get people to change the subject instead of exclaiming "Forget about that stuff, man!". For instance, you can just say "Dude, no offense, but this subject is getting old. Let's talk about something else now." or "I'm bored of the same old thing. Can we change the subject now?" If you ask people politely, they will understand. But if you do what my brother did to me and act like a Mr. Know-it-all, they're going to think you have a massive ego and a God complex. In short, what I'm trying to say is there are other ways to go about it when a certain subject overstays its welcome, and the person you're talking to tends to go on and on about it. That's all I'm saying.
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Eon101's avatar
Why would your mother side with him? Surely, she can't be blind to his faults...right?